Sunday, December 10, 2006

Contrition III

Bless me for I have sinned. I was hypocritical twice this weekend. For one, I aided a business that I detest, but it was totally for my benefit, and I’m not going to say anything more about it because none of you caught me in the act.

Next, I willingly went to a holiday party where Rust was outed. OK, here’s the scoop… It was a party of my wife’s associates and we were sitting at the table with the cool kids, so Amy, who is 42 by the way,(her age has nothing to do with the story other than I told her I'd blog her age) asked if I have been doing any writing lately, to which I replied something like, “Nothing big, but I do work on a little blog every once in a while.” To which she said, “I read this one local blog…something like Rust in Astoria…Is that your blog? That has to be you, it’s your writing for sure…” To which I giggled like a window licker on a short bus. (I thank TLF and Syd for that quote, funnier than shit, and it still makes me laugh every day.)

So now five more people know who I am, including my wife who was probably pretty sure I was working on another novel with all the time I am on this computer, and here I am blogging…I feel so dirty.

Also I misspelled "bite" in the Black Fly Post, but I did correct it.


Anonymous Moosehead said...

You know, there is a saying in my area that goes "Jamais deux sans trois" which means that incidents happening twice are likely to occur a third time. Now I'm guessing you went shopping at Sam's and to compound the hypocrisy, it was Christmas shopping.Chances are now that you will have to return the purchase thereby fulfilling the prophecy...

You paint a vivid picture of your outing. Obviously, you had a weak moment that may come back to haunt you and forgot the "Deny Deny Deny" axiom in cases of adultery and blog writing. Hopefully, your blog will not become tempered with the fear of domestic reprisal - it's far too good for that. A discussion with my wife about the "C" word blog(note the trauma induced "C")left me no doubt that some subjects should either be never discussed and, at best, never revealed. Who was it that said - what a tangled web we weave?? Plan B time??

8:48 AM  
Blogger The Guy Who Writes This said...

Moosehead, I warned you, but you didn't listen. I'm hoping it was only a discussion you were having, and that you didn't throw it out during a fight...

No, it had nothing to do with a purchase on my end. I sold some product through...well never mind. It's a funny story actually which gave me some ammo for a distant future post. With some sales pending, I need to keep it under my hat for the time being.

Remember when you gave your business card to that Mountie and he stopped by...well kind of like that, but no police were involved. Trust me, it will be a funny post one day.

Did I tell you all that Amy is 42?

9:04 AM  
Anonymous smashfork said...

This is soooo low of you. Geez. Okay the world at large, or all of astoria who actually reads this blog knows my age. Thank you, sooooo much. I am now tortured by the pithy revealing things I know about you, but can't reveal since I, unlike the red-faced caught-out you, am honorable. I am at least, good-looking and younger than you.

12:40 PM  
Anonymous Moosehead said...

42?? I thought you said Amy was born in '42??

2:55 PM  
Anonymous smashfork said...

1842. I'm recycled.

3:15 PM  
Anonymous Wende said...

Ahh... so, how does it feel to be an honest man? :D

4:11 PM  
Blogger The Guy Who Writes This said...

Amy, I thought you only read this from work? Hey, I didn't use your full name, so you are pretty safe that no one knows cept me and the others at the table. Indeed you are younger, better looking then me and I will add funnier and have more energy.

Wende, life just isn't the same without something to hide. Now I'll have to go out and do something bad so I'll have something new to hide.

4:41 PM  
Blogger Zoe said...

I could have kicked myself for having this same moment in my life. It's all cool now.

6:35 PM  
Blogger The Guy Who Writes This said...

Zoe, Outting your blog? Quasi supporting something you are against? Or telling people how old Amy is?

10:04 PM  
Blogger Mom of Three said...

Huh. I would have thought you went to Wal-Mart from how dirty-sounding you are!

But you feel dirty for blogging? I've seen some dirty blogs, and this ain't it.

11:37 PM  
Blogger Syd said...

Is MOM of Three pointing a finger at me? LOL

Wish I could have seen your window lickin' self. Will your wife read your blog now?

4:12 AM  
Blogger The Guy Who Writes This said...

Mo3, I feel dirty because I'm not writing another novel. It's in my head, and I'm writing a blog. No, had I gone to Wal*Mart I wouldn't have mentioned it in anything other than my suicide note.

Syd, I'm sure she's not pointing at you. She's replied on your blog once and has mentioned your blog positively in her blog. Window licking self was disgusting. Amy, who is 42 will come back and tell you all about it I'm sure, unless she is as polite as she professes.

I doubt my wife will read it, she hates computers. She does love to read, so if I print out every article she'll read it and then argue with me by asking, "How could you say that about..."

6:04 AM  

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