Friday, June 13, 2008

The Legacy


I was having an e-mail chat with one of the readers here and he shared a slogan button with me and a great inappropriate place to wear the said button. I replied that this button would need an explanation if it were ever found after his demise.

That got me thinking about what I should get rid of before I die. Think of it, one day you will die and someone will be responsible for going through all your stuff. So just what do you do with the salacious correspondence that Grandma saved from the 40s when she tried to keep up the morale of her man who was fighting in the war? The woman who read you stories and baked pies... She wanted to do what when he returned home? What happens to Grand-Pa’s stash of porno that he left in the shed? What if they had some toys? They may have been gag gifts that they too embarrassed to throw away. Maybe they haven't seen or used these things for 30 years and forgotten about them, but they are still their artifacts after they die.

I don’t have any bongs or drugs or pornography. I may have some books that might cause concern and lead people to think I was some sort of an anarchist wacko. I have some old fiction and articles that I wrote that I should get rid of simply because they are archaic with concepts I no longer embrace.

So imagine your entire life of making a name for your self and becoming a respected member of the community coming to an abrupt end when someone finds out one of your secrets after you die. Anyone remember J Edgar Hoover? How about Nelson Rockefeller? Nuff said?

So a public service reminder to all of the readers here… What do you need to get rid of before it is found without an explanation?

14 Comments:

Blogger Me. Here. Right now. said...

I would be fine with anything they found.

However, I have strict instructions and a house key for a very close friend. I am to enter her house, go to her bedroom, look under the bed, and take the "toybox" out before her sister flies in. Blood oath.

6:40 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Have you ever thought about why you still have these artifacts?

7:21 AM  
Blogger The Guy Who Writes This said...

As stated I don't have artifacts other written words. My books take me back to a time when those things were important to me. My writing I keep to remind me of my progress, kind of like holding on to a high school year book.

I am reminded of the death oath that the friends of Franz Kafka took. They were to destroy all of his works when he died, but they instead read them and then had them published. Good for us...maybe, but real rat bastard friends.

Lori, you are a dear friend. But what will you do with them?

8:21 AM  
Blogger weese said...

hmm, this is a way better tip than killing weeds with boiling water.

I am going to go home and have a look around - just to be safe.
I think who ever does my clean up will mostly likely wonder why I kept so many little screws and nails and washers and parts to stuff.
I wonder if they will find the money....

12:55 PM  
Blogger Syd said...

I already took all the drugs. So, that's not a problem.

Yeah, I think I'll stop there.

1:39 PM  
Blogger Uncle Walt said...

A related question should be ... what should you go get, to leave a lasting impression?

Imagine your heirs surprise, finding a cadaver in that freezer in the garage that "he never used". Now they (think they) know why.

A medical supply store could supply plenty of (literal) skeletons for your closet.

ROFL

2:38 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Gosh, I never thought of that....I wonder if any one would even want my anatomicaly correct pygmy love doll, some odd, but intereresting, 18th century surgical equipment and my life long collection of dismembered Barbie dolls?

Maybe I'll put'em on free cycle before I check out

2:41 PM  
Blogger The Guy Who Writes This said...

Weese, you could hire me to come out and snoop through your stuff...er I mean assess your risk.

Syd, if I were you I'd be worried about what people will find in your fridge.

Walt, something tells me that they will have to call in a special team when you go.

Pygmy love doll? I think there is space for you on the usenet news groups: alt.binaries.photos.pygmylovedolls
Damn the internet is weird.

3:49 PM  
Blogger Mike S said...

Almost everything I've managed to get that's been remotely incriminating of my character has already been mooched by the dubious characters that visit us:):)

11:03 PM  
Blogger Bpaul said...

"I am to enter her house, go to her bedroom, look under the bed, and take the "toybox" out before her sister flies in. Blood oath."

Made my day. Can't say why, really, just struck me as truly awesome.

Cool post Guy. I think I'm too brain dead to contemplate it fully, but it was a good read.

Bp

11:54 PM  
Blogger Beth said...

Many things - but I'm not going to humiliate myself while I'm still alive.
But you have prompted me to toss some of this stuff.

4:38 AM  
Blogger The Guy Who Writes This said...

Mike that called living well.

Bp You should be reclaiming your brain again soon, but expect it to be sucked out again if you get that job.

Beth, Really? You of all people?

5:28 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hahahahaha! Oh my goodness gracious! "Goodness has nothing to do with it"

Leave behind a fake journal, with a box of fake id's, and theater makeup. Make sure you don't finish the journal, and throw in an old passport, stamped w/a bunch of exotic places.

4:36 PM  
Blogger The Guy Who Writes This said...

You can create some cool stuff with photo shop as well.

5:15 AM  

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