Wednesday, November 15, 2006

Sick Day VII

I’m sick of Christmas! (I bet you saw this one coming down Fifth Ave). Yes, I’m sick that Christmas crap was on display in stores in September. I’m sick that there were Christmas commercials on TV in October. I’m sick of all the conservatives who are shoving Christmas down people’s throats. My standard reply to both “Merry Christmas” and “Happy Holidays” is “Keep it to yourself, Schmuck!” I’m sick that those of non-Christian faiths or no faiths have to tolerate this annual mania. I’m sick of musicians trying to score immortality by recording a Christmas song that will be played every year. I’m sick that all that plastic crap that people are buying for Christmas is destined to become land fill and future generations will be eternally stuck with your garbage. If you feel you must participate in this frenzy at least shop locally for locally produced products, and hopefully it will be something that can be consumed and recycled like, wine, cheese, chocolate, art, baked goods. Think about this next year when Sunday Market is open (without dogs I hope). All the stuff there is produced locally (relatively).

Here’s a free slogan for those of you in the Porno industry, “Let’s keep the X in X-mas.” My gift to dirty bastards, I’m sick of you, too.

Finally, I’m sick that there aren’t more photos of a vomiting Santa to borrow on the Internet.


Blogger Boo7 said...

I have to agree that I get blitzed out on the whole xmas commercialism....too much, too early....too everything really!!! But what really caught my eye about your post today was....searching the internet for vomitting Santa images!!! OMG!!! there is just something about that....lemme think on it for the day and I'll get back to you!!

signed: the other christmas commercialism grinch!!

6:01 AM  
Blogger Boo7 said...

oh and yesssss....I did see this post coming down 5th Avenue.....right behind the Santa Clause parade....**wink**

6:02 AM  
Blogger Storminmotion said...

my dumb question is:,,,the drawing behind that a human holding his throat? ...and his head the sack? I know I am slow...

8:07 AM  
Anonymous gearhead said...

It's a free country and my wife & I are both over 21; we make choices.
To celebrate any holiday is a choice for us.
Are we going to participate in Xmas this year? The answer is no. No means that not one single penny will be spent, not one minute devoted to.
It freaks people out that know you, those in the majority that let society make their desicions for them.
Are we celebrating thanksgiving?
Yes. Next year we will decide again.
It's great to stand on your own two feet.

8:34 AM  
Anonymous Thartill said...

I also hate all the bells and whistles of Christmas and how everything comes so early.

But Christmas is fun and another reason to celebrate and knock some drinks down. (in moderation of Jesus would of wanted..)

So I think you are being a bit extreme in your Christmas rant. Kind of like Bill O'Reilly but with the opposite opinion.

8:50 AM  
Blogger The Guy Who Writes This said...

I will have another story on this topic in a couple weeks.

Barb, not really much to think about, just find me some Santa vomit for next year ; )

Storm, dang I don't really know what that is behind him, but it looks like he was painted over a head of some sort.

Gearhead, I love it when you join us on the dark side. You don't have grand children yet, do you?

8:53 AM  
Anonymous portosan said...

I could be percieved as a grinch as well. I have noticed a wierd energy about as the holidays approach through the holidays ending. Some folks are mean, others bottomed out and hurting.
It's Buls%*t.

When my Son was born I had the thought of celebrating christmass time as other faiths or cultures do. One year, Hanakah, next year kwansa, year after that rammadan. Sounded like an interesting idea at the time.

Not doing that as yet.

Good for you guys gearheads. I am celabrating gearhead style this year. Sounds good.

8:57 AM  
Blogger The Guy Who Writes This said...

Gee, T, I thought I was being easy on it. You should have heard my rants 5 years ago.

Also to the folks T's business sells locally smoked fish, so consider supporting a local business with a local product if you must buy something for someone.

Portosan, I'm still laughing over those photos you emailed me. You will see them here soon. Thanks!

9:38 AM  
Blogger Boo7 said...

trust me if I find any images of santa vomit....and the chances are high what with all the websurfing I am fond of doing......they will be sent straight to you my friend!

9:43 AM  
Blogger The Guy Who Writes This said...

Barb, just turns me on knowing that there are people out there who align me with Santa vomit.

12:58 PM  
Anonymous gearhead said...

Get ready for this portosan:
"So, are you doing anything special for Christmas?"
"No, we decided not to participate this year."
Blank stare.
" it a religious objection?".
It is beyond most people's grasp that you could set down and make that decision for yourself.
They assume that for you not to participate in their group, means that you take your programming from another group.
Guy, I want you to sing at my funeral. Please sing, "I did it my way"

1:01 PM  
Blogger Syd said...

Please...bash Christmas and the commercialization thereof as often as you like. I for one, enjoy it.

1:33 PM  
Blogger Trish said...

Another Christmas grinch? It seems I am not alone...although I have to put on a festive face for my kids and conservative/traditional hub & inlaws.

I also dislike New Years and tend to just stay home and go to bed before midnight. Ha, I couldn't even stay awake if I to bed. My favorite day of the year is January 2 when it is all mercifully over.

You're right about the consumables for gifts. I just can't bring myself to search for little treasures that will just end up in next summers garage sale. So, smoked salmon, maple syrup, jars of jam it is then.

And Barb- Since you'll be at my house for Christmas this year you can expect one of the above...or a bottle of tequila ;-)

1:36 PM  
Blogger Boo7 said...

roflmao Trish.....bottle of tequila and some smoked salmon might go very well together!!!

2:06 PM  
Blogger The Guy Who Writes This said...

Gearhead, like I'm going to out live you...but then you do piss off more people that I. So it's a deal, and if I go first your job will be to prevent anyone from playing Amazing Grace or Will the Circle Be Unbroken at my funeral. No god damn bagpipes either.

Syd, darlin, it's only November, I'm just getting started. Stick around.

Trish and Barb, I think I need to come to Canada. Food and drink, you sisters are OK in my book. BTW cute photo of the two of you with the dog. I have daughter envy.

2:34 PM  
Blogger Boo7 said...

I am surprised we have not heard from Moosehead yet on the whole Christmas issue??

And Syd there ARE some things I like about the xmas season...just not the spend, spend, spend...more and bigger is better attitude commercialism!!!

2:42 PM  
Anonymous Moosehead said...

Bah Humbug!! Here I am being good and quiet and then somebody has to rattle my cage. I must admit though, I am not a real keener when Guy is posting mushy mushy new age stuff, but I am a real fan of his rants and rages of dry humor that never fail to inspire me to new lows...and in that spirit, I will share my Christmas tale.
There was once a young lad who had his parents at wits end due to his constant cussin'. When asked what he wanted from Santa, he would reply "I wan't a fucking pair of skates", or "I wan't a fucking set of walkie talkies".
To teach him a lesson, the parents decided to box and wrap doggie poo. On the morning of the great event, Junior started frantically opening boxes, and showing no reaction after having gone through them, left the house to play with the neighborhood kids. Of course, the subject of conversation was what did you get for Christmas. Johnny says he got a Nintendo game, Billy says he got an electric train... finally, somebody asks Junior what he got and he replies "I got a fucking dog but I can't find the fucking thing!

Now that you have all (with the exception of Syd) pretty much trashed Chrismas,I admit I pretty much enjoy it too. I'll send you some snow if you want Syd...but then again, you can probably get some at your local ice house. Before you all jump on my case here, I will qualify the above and state that it should be reserved for kids cause if you go back to your earliest memories,some of the best ones are of waking up Christmas mornings(if you managed to get to sleep) and getting that indestructible three wheeler or that baking powder powered submarine...I don't recall getting any tequila though... Hell, if you don't have any kids or grandkids or nephews or neices, borrow one! If they are really young, be sure to get nice boxes as they may be more fun than today's toys!

3:43 PM  
Blogger Boo7 said...

always happy to rattle your cage moosehead!!! **grin**

4:16 PM  
Blogger Rich said...

Decamber 16.

Be there.

4:30 PM  
Anonymous Wende said...

Heh... I'm with T on this...

And, you might not want to visit my blog in December. (or any month come to think of it, but especially not December)

Fair warning, m'kay. :)

6:15 PM  
Anonymous portosan said...

Quite a perspective, moosehead!

I admit that I can get self centered.

It is true about how something soo ordinary as a box and a thoughtfull presentation can be the best times of all for a child especially when shared with an adult. It was true with my daughter for sure. The best memories for me did'nt cost much money, if at all. I had not thought of that in awhile.

I can reserve the kwansa/hanakah celebrations for when my son gets much older.

Thinking outloud now, oope, powers back on. Anyway. Heres to the kids

8:24 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Man, I had a rant about this before freakin' Halloween. (This is the right blog I'm commenting on, I hope!)

If you want my opinion (and if you didn't, you'd block my comments) I think the retail industry is shooting itself in the foot because they will be forced, eventually, to leave the crap out all year long. Then it won't be special anymore. Then it won't sell.

So there.

9:55 PM  
Blogger The Guy Who Writes This said...

Wende, I do understand that it is in yout best interest tp keep the whole thing going, but those of us without faith and youngins at home can now rise up and revolt.

Mom, yes, you are on the right blog today. For those of you following at home, Mom of 3 left a beautiful comment about one of the articles here on someone elses blog. Made me laugh, and made Jiggy think WTF?

6:27 AM  
Blogger The Guy Who Writes This said...

Rich, great photos on that site, thanks for sharing. I didn't find any Santa vomit shots though.

Moosehead. Did you finish removing all your snow yet?

We had a good wind storm yesterday. Power still out at my place. Trees down everywhere. I was posting via laptop battery and lantern light this morning.

8:35 AM  
Anonymous wende said...

My reasons for keeping "the whole thing going" might surprise you. It's certainly not for the reasons most people assume--(i.e. has NOTHING to do with being clergyish).

However, that being said--people should do what they want this time of year. If it makes more sense to walk away completely, by all means, DO SO. I'll try not to shove my over enthusiastic mania down your throat and you can work on not spoiling the fun with your cynicism.(or I can just not read you in December, er, November--Oh hell, after July!) Because, Dammit, Jesus doesn't like cynics. Heh. :)

1:41 PM  
Blogger The Guy Who Writes This said...

Wende, good idea. If you see a Christmas photo pop up, it will be a good idea to hit the back arrow.

Jesus doesn't like cynics, eh? So he's reading my blog now, too? I don't need that presssure. As if having the S. Carton Family reading wasn't enough pressure ; ) now I've got Jesus looking over my stuff.

By the way, next time you talk to him, please remind him that the agricultural things that were going on at the time of his birth happen in September, not December, so if stores want to start celebrating Christmas in July, make sure they finish up in September. Yes, Jesus was a Virgo. I know how that feels. Sometimes crusifixication is easier than being a Virgo.

Hope I made you smile, Wende...

9:10 AM  

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