Monday, January 01, 2007

Death Pool 2007

As New Years revelers nurse their hangovers and make resolutions not to ever drink again, Astoria Rust is much less remorseful. I don’t have anything to atone for, and had I, it would have appeared in one of my Contrition posts.

With all the year in review shows on TV, one tends to think back on the past. Though only a few Rust readers remember any of the old web sites I’ve had over the years, I was reminded of a tradition I started way back when, which I plan to continue here.

So welcome to the first annual Astoria Rust Death Pool. Since our readers in Washington State can face pretty stiff penalties for Internet gambling I will tone this down to personal rewards of Karma. Here are some names, and feel free add more if you think I’ve missed anyone. Keep your own records. You may choose any name on the list and if the person dies this year you get a karma point. If you pick them and they don’t die you lose a karma point. It’s a pretty simple cosmic wager.

So here are some names of people I am betting will die in 2007:

Lauren Bacall
Yogi Berra
Jack Black
Fidel Castro
Walter Cronkite
Billy Graham
Andy Griffith
Stephen Hawkings
Don Ho
Alan King
Larry King
Tommy LaSorta
Jerry Lewis
Rupert Murdock
Iggy Pop
Andy Rooney
Micky Rooney
JD Salinger
Pete Seeger
Tony Soprano
Charlie Watts
Kurt Vonnegut


Blogger Syd said...

Great choices. I actually thought some of those were already dead. Courtney Love usually makes my list.

7:55 AM  
Blogger Beth said...

What a mind you have. What a list.

I don't want J.D. Salinger nor Kurt Vonneut to "go." Have you jinked them?

8:01 AM  
Blogger The Guy Who Writes This said...

Syd, ahhh yes, the Yoko of Grunge. Being she is from Seattle she can probably go on for a few more years. The cold and wet up there tends to toughen one up. At her age the only way out is to go out like her husband, or choke on vomit like Hendrix.

Sallinger is 88 and Vonnegut is 85. Vonnegut can barely breathe any more. If I were to pick Vonnegut will probably go first because of his health concerns. Sallinger may stay a bit longer because he has hidden himself from people so well. But sorry Beth, these guys are circling the drain. I'd be happy if they lived, but I have strong doubts.

8:22 AM  
Blogger The Guy Who Writes This said...

Oh, and by the way, Gerald Ford and James Brown were on this list, but they checked out early. If they only could have waited I would have two karma points.

8:51 AM  
Anonymous gearhead said...

I sure have my fingers crossed that God doesn't call Oral Roberts home this year.

9:15 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think some of those may be "wishful thinking".....

9:53 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Gearhead - may Pat Robertson will come up with another "prediction" (ha)in which all of these people will be raptured.......

9:54 AM  
Blogger The Guy Who Writes This said...

No wishful thinking here. That list would be really large and involve much younger people. I think it is a good balance of people who could actually check out this year, regardless of politics or business. involvement.

12:15 PM  
Blogger Amaya said...

Jack Black huh? Do you have any predictions as to how he will die?
Wouldn't that be weird to be one of the celebrities on your list and to see this blog?

3:42 PM  
Blogger The Guy Who Writes This said...

Yeah, I put him on the list as an over weight manic type like Balushi, Farley and Candy. Lots of career highs and lows.

Yes, I'd like to hear from Castro, Salinger or Vonnegut. The rest...pffft

4:04 PM  
Blogger Boo7 said...

My one vote would be for Castro....I don't imagine he will be around much longer....if he hasn't gone already and there is some kind of cover-up happening that we don't know about yet....I think I was a conspiracy theorist in a previous life lol!!!

8:14 PM  
Blogger Mom of Three said...

I agree with Fidel, Lasorda and Graham, but I think Jack Black looks fine, unless a car wreck gets him. Jerry Lewis? Yeah, that seems reasonable. Larry King, too.

I think Cheney's heart has given its all a long time ago, so I'll throw that one onto the list.

11:23 PM  
Anonymous Auntie L said...

Oh yeah, you left out the perpetually "looks as if he's already dead celebrity" - Keith Richards.

I'll also throw in "Dick Van Dyke"

6:25 AM  
Blogger The Guy Who Writes This said...

You know Auntie L, I con sidered VanDyke, but the bastard still looks pretty good. He may make the list next year. And for Keith Richards, he is the all-time greatest white drug abuser in history. I think he may already be dead, but is too numb to know it. I think in the end it will be up to a carbon 14 test to tell for sure.

Mo3, as for Cheney, only the good go young, he's still able to shoot at people so he's probably still too young, unfortunately.

Also I added Stephen Hawkings to the list this morning.

8:07 AM  
Anonymous F. Lee said...

Alan King?

He's been flying a marble kite for going on two years, hasn't he?

4:07 AM  
Blogger The Guy Who Writes This said...

Yep, you're right. He kacked in 2004. I'll leave him there as a retro thing.

7:50 AM  

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