Monday, April 02, 2007

Sick Day XII


I’m sick of Brownsmead. Get this Brownsmead residents, your shit stinks, too. I know you don’t think so, but you have been sucking fumes from Waunna for so long that you can no longer smell reality. Your shit stinks, and we are getting pretty sick of it. So get over that superiority attitude that you have going on of you. Remember the peace loving, equality for all beliefs you all had when you were young Hippies? Well, it’s time to get off your high horse and get back on the wagon, philosophically.

I'm curious, is the name based on Brown's Mead? Or was it Brown Smead?

And would it kill you to put up some street signs in that elevated swamp in which you live so people can get back to the highway without driving down every freaking road in your little burg? We are on to you, so knock it off. And by the way, Namaste, you rat bastards.

10 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Whoa easy there bitterness, just because maybe you went on a Sunday drive, got lost, ran out of gas and got caught siphoning out of Debbie Twombly's old Ford tractor, does not mean you have to give up your dream of taking up the ukulele, joining the Brownsmead Flats and touring Japan. Next time stop by the Century 21 office and get one of their free maps. Just kidding Guy, regards.

8:13 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ah fudge, I had a nagging suspicion that I should have looked up Namaste before posting. Now I see the jokes on me. Thank God I went anon and didn't include the part about Debbie spotting you from her hot tub and chasing you down the driveway in her birthday suit.

10:56 AM  
Blogger The Guy Who Writes This said...

Namaste and Namaste you rat bastards have meanings that are directly opposed. Kind of like saying, good bye and good bye shit head. I was just trying to Bhundlah it up a bit so they would understand.

12:13 PM  
Blogger Mom of Three said...

Are those the rat bastards in the picture for yesterday's entry???

I always tell my kids (because we are of the second-hand and one income ilk) that whenever anyone tries to make them feel inferior, just picture that person taking a really difficult poop. Crass, yes, but at the same time I don't cotton to false senses of superiority...especially basedon geography.

I was thinking something similar this weekend about Cannon beach, actually. Here was a place founded as a hippie commune that is now so monied and so strictly controlled that all the buildings--city hall, businesses, homes--have this cedar-sided Stepford aura. Fine, if that's what you want, but a little eerie to drive through!

12:56 PM  
Blogger The Guy Who Writes This said...

Mo3, interesting you should mention that. It is the difference between a community with controled development and Warrenton,( your husband's favorite town) a community with uncontrolled development. It's a hard call, uncontrolled freedom or controlled uniniformatity. I prefer no development, but if I were to invest, Cannon Beach will hold a better value over time.

1:14 PM  
Anonymous Dicky James said...

Brownsmead???


BWAAAAAAAAAAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAAA!!

Has Hollywood overlooked them as the location of the filming of the sequel of Deliverance?

1:31 PM  
Blogger Mom of Three said...

Geez, Guy, I don't suppose there could ever be some MIDDLE GROUND???? I wouldn't live in either place, frankly.

12:19 AM  
Blogger The Guy Who Writes This said...

Mo3, you do live in neither, but if the local Hysterical Society gets their way you'll be having gas lamps on and in your house.

Dickey J. Other bad films await that swamp.

2:16 PM  
Blogger lori hahn said...

Man, you are hilarious. I don't even know these places and have just inserted "Waterloo" for "Brown's Mead"--it just makes so much sense. Iowa had its own version of this story, without the hippies!

9:12 AM  
Blogger The Guy Who Writes This said...

Lori, these places are all too real. Especially Brown Smead.

6:31 PM  

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