Thursday, March 22, 2007

Tank Drainer 2000

Maybe it’s a guy thing, but I am into water pressure. I’ve been shown houses to buy in the past and passed them up because of poor water pressure. My present house has great pressure, and even better now than when I first bought it because I replaced all the galvanized pipes and our water district went from a four inch to a ten inch main.

Sure it’s important that I can spray the sky lights from the ground. Sure it’s important to be able to knock large hunks of mud from the bottom of the truck. However most important I need good water pressure to drill holes in my back when I shower.

Yes, I know how important it is to conserve our natural resources and especially water, but having a shower that can shoot to the bone is important to me.

The greatest thing the previous owner of my house left me was a shower head. I call it the Tank Drainer 2000. When my wife’s kids lived with us I had to remove this shower head because they took half hour showers and they would totally drain all the hot water in the house. I replaced it with an efficient shower head just to conserve; they were not pleased.

I took great joy when they moved out. I got my old Tank Drainer 2000 out of the place I carefully stored it. I soaked it in CLR and found a roll of Teflon tape and my channel locks. Twist off the old and twist on the older. I removed my clothing and took it for a spin.

Oh the feeling of the water was reminiscent (though I never experienced it) of being shot kindly in the back with several rounds from a pneumatic roofing nailer, in a good kind of a way, not a bloody way.

The Tank Drainer 2000 is still in commission. I begin every morning with it. Some mornings it is so gloriously painful (that’s a good thing) that I am nearly brought to my knees. One thing I know is that if I ever move, the Tank Drainer 2000 is coming with me. I may take it with me to my grave.


Blogger Beth said...

Big whine here. I want one. For my back. Does a Tank Drainer 2000 really exist?

7:13 AM  
Blogger Jaggy said...

When we were looking at renting our house while in college, we found a great house with a fantastic showerhead. That showerhead mysteriously disappeared between initial inspection and move-in day. I lived with a stationary (hose-less) showerhead until I had to clean the shower the first time. Unacceptable! I went to a local store and bought a showerhead with a hose. I installed it all by myself, too (my princess of a roommate freaking out the whole time, lol). I took it with me when we moved out. That's my showerhead.

7:18 AM  
Anonymous thartill said...

Ah yes...agree completely. That is what I call a "Power Shower".

7:50 AM  
Blogger Jaggy said...

P.S. I totally posted first this morning, but had to enter that fucking password thing nineteen times before I got all the letters right. So there! :P

11:50 AM  
Blogger The Guy Who Writes This said...

Ahh, Jaggy you have to get up pretty early to beat Beth. Sorry about the security codes, but I really do get a lot of spam here. I will try taking it down again next month and see how it goes, again.

Beth, that is just my name for it. It is probably no longer available since it is law, here that only efficient shower heads are sold. Maybe ebay. It looks just like the one in the photo, and the part where the water comes out is metal, not plastic.

TH, the next step is a pressure washer. Now there's an idea...

12:09 PM  
Anonymous thartill said...

Jaggy what language!
I'm shocked...SHOCKED I tell ya!

1:32 PM  
Anonymous Moosehead said...

Jaggy got potty mouth, Jaggy got potty mouth.
Isn't it great when you realize you have had a positive influence on the yutes.

2:32 PM  
Blogger The Guy Who Writes This said...

Hey you guys, Jaggy has had a bad month. She broke up with her boyfriend and was in a wreck with her car. Besides I like it when she talks like that...

2:38 PM  
Anonymous thartill said...

We all know that you like it when the ladies talk dirty to you Guy.

Remember though..Grand-daughters...

3:15 PM  
Blogger The Guy Who Writes This said...

Yes, Jaggy is young enough to be my grand daughter, but she's paid her dues. She has loved and lost, she finished her education. She's old enough to buy me a beer or an icecream. She works with people who give her shit for being young. Jaggy is OK by me to say what ever she wants. By the way, you are both about the same age. Want to meet one another??? She likes men who can dance, and not just around the issues...

3:43 PM  
Anonymous thartill said...

While I think she is a cutie and I have no doubt we would get along great, I think our jobs will keep us in our respective towns for a while. And I'm not a Long Dist. guy.

She likes men who can dance

How could you possibly know this? Wait a minute, have you been hanging out at the Wet Dog at 1 or 2 in the morning?

7:12 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

My mothers apartment has water pressure that will take will take your skin right off and I love it. It's like a spa treatment.

7:43 PM  
Blogger Mom of Three said...

Everyone knows Jaggy likes to dance...she's in that dance club thingy.

Great post about Jaggy, Guy!

Oh, wait! Shower pressure! Damn straight! Aesthetically, I would rather have those large sunflowery gentle rain shower heads. But I can't abide by it, regardless of how authentic it looks.

When I was in high school, my parents bought one of those newfangled detachable shower massage ones. O.M.G. The uses a pent-up teenage girl could find for such a thing!

8:16 PM  
Blogger Jaggy said...

OMG LOL! YOU PEOPLE ROCK! Come on over to me blog to see some thoughts. ;)

This totally made my month.

9:16 PM  
Blogger Auntie L said...

Guy -

Pressure is a "guy" thing. Over my lifetime I have seen lack of water pressure reduce grown men to tears and fits of frustration making them spend freakin' hours on a shower head trying to make it 'work better'.

5:44 AM  
Blogger The Guy Who Writes This said...

TH you just outed yourself on that one. I was just giving you the low down on how to win her heart.

Trish, I'm so glad to see it's not only a "man" thing, besides that may be the only way to warm up in the Great White North.

Mo3 you make me laugh...damn you make me laugh.

Jaggy, Darlin...what can I say?

Auntie L, you should go back and read what Trish and Mo3 wrote.

5:58 AM  

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