Friday, May 11, 2007

Opening Sunday Market

The Astoria Sunday Market begins again this Sunday. I will probably go and see some old friends, step in some dog shit and come back to write yet another anti-dog article.

Really people, let’s have respect for others and leave Poochie at home. I know you think that Poochie is a family member and thus deserves all the benefits a two legged child deserves, but really, Poochie is a dog. Poochie can lick his or her own anus and does so often and with vigor. Poochie even loves licking the anus of other animals. The next time I see a dog licking a human’s lip I’m going to puke. Just seeing people with their ass licking dogs makes me want to puke. So please, just for me, leave them at home.

Now for my personal ass kissing moment, Happy Mother’s Day to all you mothers.


Blogger Jaggy said...

I agree completely. I'm not big on dogs to begin with, but when I see them licking someone's face, well, it feels like all of my organs instantly liquefy and attempt to come out my nose. *shudder*

I don't remember the exact findings, but I think Mythbusters proved that dogs' mouths aren't actually cleaner than humans'...

7:18 AM  
Blogger Hahn at Home said...

People bringing their pets to shop at Petsmart or Petco. The mostly unsocialized, untrained beasts do what dogs do and get into it with the other dogs and pee all over, and the owners are clueless walking around thinking, "isn't my precious Princess much prettier than these other dogs." I have two dogs and they do not go to public gathering places--but I didn't take my kids to upscale restaurants when they were screaming toddlers either. I'm whicha' on this.

7:36 AM  
Blogger The Guy Who Writes This said...

Mythbusters? you are now Mo3's best friend...

Lori, just tell me you don't let them kiss you on the mouth.

I'm going to sit back and let TH and Mo3 have at me.

7:57 AM  
Blogger Donna said...

I don't even like dogs in my car. Hair flying all over... yuck.

8:01 AM  
Blogger Beth said...

Only you could combine a post about ass licking dogs and a Mother's Day Wish.
But I'll happily take the best wishes!

8:33 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Beth, that is exactly what I was going to say to Guy also. Where else would us Mother's get felicitations along with comparisons to dogs licking anus's?
Only at Guy's, thats where.

9:39 AM  
Blogger Mel said...

Thanks for the wishes! And I used to be a dog person; now... not so much. They are dirty and stinky and lack good hygiene. And good manners.
But I do like them a lot, for all that. I just don't want to own one. Or fight off their disgusting germy kisses.

2:01 PM  
Blogger The Guy Who Writes This said...

I'm just trying to end on a positive note ; )

6:27 PM  
Blogger Rich said...

Nice Puppy

6:19 PM  
Blogger Mom of Three said...

Y'all are just bitter because you can't lick your own genitals.

I'll make sure I feed my biggest dog right before the market, and put a little flag in her doo doo with "Guy" written on it. Like the flags with Bush's picture on them.

On the other hand, wouldn't it be cool if you could walk your horse around the market?

Oh! That reminds me, I have to email you!

10:54 PM  
Blogger The Guy Who Writes This said...

Rich, Eeewww!

No I wouldn't take a horse into that environment. I've seen horses explode in less stressful places with fewer people. But then if they could step on a few dogs.... I await your email.

6:18 AM  

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