Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Oh Canada


I took this from our pal Moosehead. Being we are living through a cold snap right now I was reminded of my time in the North Country.

Now...you're truly a Canadian if...

If your local Dairy Queen is closed from
September through May,
You may live in Canada .

If someone in a Home Depot store
Offers you assistance and they don't work there,
You may live in Canada .

If you've worn shorts and a parka at the same time,
You may live in Canada .

If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation
With someone who dialed a wrong number,
You may live in Canada .

If 'Vacation' means going anywhere
South of Detroit for the weekend,
You may live in Canada .

If you measure distance in hours,
You may live in Canada .

If you know several people
Who have hit a deer more than once,
You may live in Canada .

If you have switched from 'heat' to 'A/C'
In the same day and back again,
You may live in Canada .

If you can drive 90 km/hr through 2 feet of snow
During a raging blizzard without flinching,
You may live in Canada .

If you install security lights on your house and garage,
But leave both unlocked,
You may live in Canada .

If you carry jumpers in your car
And your wife knows how to use them,
You may live in Canada .

If you design your kid's Halloween costume
To fit over a snowsuit,
You may live in Canada .

If the speed limit on the highway is 80 km --
You're going 90 and everybody is passing you,
You may live in Canada .

If driving is better in the winter
Because the potholes are filled with snow,
You may live in Canada .

If you know all 4 seasons:
Almost winter, winter, still winter,
And road construction,
You may live in Canada .

If you have more miles
On your snow blower than your car,
You may live in Canada .

If you find 2 degrees F 'a little chilly',
You may live in Canada .


So now you know...

14 Comments:

Blogger Beth said...

And if you smile and nod while reading this post, you are definitely Canadian.
Season’s Greetings from one of your Canuck friends!

5:27 AM  
Blogger Auntie said...

I often think of you as not only an honorary lesbian, but also an honorary Canuck. Love ya!

5:42 AM  
Blogger darev2005 said...

Almost all of that applies to living in Alaska, as well. But they're practically Canadians anyway. They tend to have that same strange accent. I think it comes from your lips being frozen for so many months out of the year. Spent four years up there. Took me two years after to get rid of the accent.

8:11 AM  
Blogger Trish said...

*sigh*

it's all so true

11:07 AM  
Blogger g said...

this list is not complete.

you made no reference to hockey or people that say "ay"

2:45 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I've never known a Canuck yet that could talk for more than fivie minutes without at least one hockey or moose reference.

5:55 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Well...somehow fitting here. A fellow I ran into told me he had just visited Kapuskasing Ontario which is in the far north. Upon hearing this,I blurted Kapuskasing? But there are only whores and hockey players in that town. Upset, he said, hey..wait a minute. My mother lives there! So I asked...what position does she play? Gotta be fast on your feet ya know....

Thanks Guy...I'm flattered you re posted. Means I'm not the only one with a whacked out sense of humor.

Moose

6:39 PM  
Anonymous gearhead said...

Auntie Said:
>>>I often think of you as not only an honorary lesbian, but also an honorary Canuck. Love ya!<<<

My innerds just feel hollow being passed over for such a high honor.

And now my life has changed.

I, yes I will commit my life to dethroning the current Honorary Lesbian.

How could life possibly be more fulfilling?

9:40 PM  
Blogger The Guy Who Writes This said...

Beth, so nice to see you back here again. thanks.

Auntie, I'll need the Moosehead seal of approval on that one.

Darev, I can pick up that accent by talking to the guard at the border and it takes me months to lose it as well. But I kind of like it and wouldn't kick it if people stop giving me crap about it.

Trish, you are good people, crazy drivers, but good people.

g and anon, try visiting in the summer.

Moose, you go beyond whacked, that's why I always enjoy your comments.

Gearhead, Does this mean you will be starting your own blog?

5:46 AM  
Blogger dalia said...

for the record, new yorkers say "eh" a lot, too... but it's a matter of placement that differentiates canadians from the yankees.

new yorkers: "eh, it's cold out. put a coat on!"

canadians: "it's cold out, put a coat on, eh?"

haha.

and 2 degrees is NICE out, not "a little chilly." lol

7:37 PM  
Blogger The Guy Who Writes This said...

Dalia, but there it is often "Fuggin Eh!"

5:58 AM  
Blogger dalia said...

lol

it's the multi-use equivalent of saying

"omigod!"
"sweet!"
"bloody hell!"
"damn right!"

etc.,

it's an expression that makes me laugh, 'cause unless you're a true hoser, it's not often used. i can't tell you the last time i heard someone say it!

10:54 AM  
Anonymous Ginger said...

OH MY GOD....I might be Canadian! Shhhh...don't tell my kids, I'll never hear the end of it :)

A short note: we just got power back, waiting for running water, lost the 10,000sf barn and almost lost the indoor arena...whew, winter is hell this year! I'm tired of melting snow on the wood stove to flush toilets, wash dishes, do laundry, bathe, etc...This is why I worship the sun :)

3:20 PM  
Blogger The Guy Who Writes This said...

Sorry to hear it, Ginger. Hope you are insured for that sort of thing.

5:26 AM  

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