Tuesday, January 13, 2009

How Can I Not Be A Drunk?


I don’t drink much. During the last year I have had three beers, one Campari on ice, four glasses of wine and one glass of vodka spiked punch. You’d think I’d be a drunk having grown up before the current morality battalions took control of the media. It’s a wonder my generation aren’t all drunks.

This all comes to mind because I was thinking about a fight song that was sung at all high school football games when I was growing up. I don’t like football so I haven’t been to a high school football game since I was 12, but I can’t imagine this song being sung anymore. I substitute the name “Bla Bla” for the name of the high school. Here are the words:

Three cheers for old Bla Bla High,
You bring the Scotch and I’ll bring the Rye,
Send the Freshmen out for Gin
And don’t let a sober Sophomore in.
We never stumble, we never fall,
We sober up on wood alcohol,
When we yell we yell like Hell,
For the glory of Bla Bla High.

21 Comments:

Blogger loopymamain06 said...

Are you serious? Even in my high school(in my day) there would "never" have been allowed a song about alcohol. Let alone today...maybe it's a michigan thing.
da loop sipping Oolong

4:25 AM  
Blogger Beth said...

I always have trouble with the question as to alcohol consumption on medical forms – “never” doesn’t fit and there’s no other category that encompasses how little I drink.
I’m actually more concerned about this generation becoming alcoholics than my own.

4:54 AM  
Blogger Auntie said...

This WAS the Ilwaco High School theme song. I mean, we used to sing it at school assemblies and graduation and stuff besides every sporting event. LOL

5:43 AM  
Blogger dalia said...

when i was little, i was allowed to have "jsut a drop" of whatever the adults were having. as a teenager, i was allowed one full glass of whatever they were having. as an adult, i drink a little too much here and there (by that i mean, two glasses of wine as opposed to one), but i can't tell you the last time i was drunk.

because i was always permitted to have alcohol, it didn't have that sense of excitement for me... while other kids were getting drunk in parks with their friends.

i have a funny stomach these days... can hardly drink now. wine and beer are especially tough on the tummy, so i end up drinking G & Ts. they go down easier.

6:35 AM  
Blogger Jaggy said...

The district banned my high school band from playing "Tequila" and "Centerfold." We played them anyway. They got mad. We played them still. What could they do, send us all to detention? The crowd loved the songs, and we liked to play them, so we did.

But I can't stand real tequila... *shudder*

7:27 AM  
Blogger Trish said...

funny! I can imagine that song going over REAL well in todays 'moral' climate.

11:12 AM  
Blogger Mike S said...

I remember drinking songs being much more prevelant as a kid. Been a long time though. I love my ale, Scotch, and a good wine, but after a lifetime of working an occupation that left no room for error, I find I can't force myself to imbibe too much. Much cheaper this way.

12:50 PM  
Blogger Mike S said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

12:51 PM  
Anonymous Ginger said...

I grew up w/ an abusive alcoholic step father. My "parents" (if that's what you'd call them) drank on a daily basis. My "mother" (we call her "Mother of the Year", not that she'll get THAT award EVER!) looked the other way...Catholic and all. My husband and I have our own theory on drinking. We think it IS a parents responsibility to teach their kids HOW to drink responsibly. Everything in moderation. Otherwise, kids have NO IDEA what to expect when they get out on their own (because their brains aren't fully developed :). I'm not saying don't drink...just be smart about it. My friends laugh at me because I have had beer go bad in my fridge...they say "that would NEVER happen at my house!". The stuff we have is usually given to us. I think our friends want us to have something for them when they come over :) PLUS: we don't drink due to the fact that we are always on call (w/ the fire department) while at home...safety first!

2:47 PM  
Blogger weese said...

ok...but was that on the same night?

6:16 PM  
Blogger g said...

hell guy, i never needed no song to get drunk!

which is precisely why i quit.

i just listen to music now.

7:39 PM  
Blogger darev2005 said...

I used to have a real problem with the stuff myself. I appear to have grown out of it. My last bottle of scotch lasted me close to a year and I have had two leftover beers in the fridge for almost six months, right next to half a bottle of mead. I can remember when my whole present stock wouldn't have lasted the night. I know europeans still love their drinking songs. The bars in germany just rocked with singing all the time. My crowd was more likely to be singing "Don't bogart that joint" or Dylans "Everybody Must Get Stoned."

8:42 PM  
Blogger The Guy Who Writes This said...

Loopy, yep, it really happened. Maybe still does, but I doubt it.

Beth, it's probably a question used to see who is a liar and who is a goody two shoes.

Auntie, thanks for backing me up on this one because it is almost unbelievable.

Dalia, this is the second or third time you mentioned your stomach. I hope you're seeing a physician.

Jaggy, though it is a totally stupid song, it is a perfect up-beat tune for a HS Band. It is perfect when played in the outdoors with all that brass.

Trish, how is it that the children of the 60s became so moral? Go figure...

Mike, when was the last time you heard, "How Dry I Am"?

Ginger, but look at how responsible the two of you are in comparison to the environment in which you grew up.

Weese, even if it were that amount would have little effect on me. It's been about 15 years since I've had enough in me to be considered as drunk. By the way, congrats on being able to drink before 5pm again.

g, you gave p drinking and smoking, just hope you don't lose your hearing.

Darev, you have to do UAs where you work, don't you?

5:29 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Never was much of a drinker - oddly enough. But do enjoy a Manhattan or two with the good company of friends. Always heeded my fathers advice - Manhattans are like a woman's breasts - one is not enough and three is too many. He also gave some pretty good advice prior to me getting married. Never tell your wife anything you don't want the whole world to know... Funny eh how parents get smarter as their children get older...

Moose

7:24 AM  
Blogger The Guy Who Writes This said...

Moose, you and your dad are too funny. Do you have any kids of your own?

7:34 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Nope..at least none that I know of from my early wandering days of sharing my pennies and moving on to the next town. A trickle of fear does run down my spine though every time the doorbell rings and it's always a relief when the guys in cheap suits turn out to be Jehovah's witnesses...

Moose

7:44 AM  
Blogger darev2005 said...

Random drug testing is a communist plot, I'm sure of it.

8:30 AM  
Blogger The Guy Who Writes This said...

Moose, maybe one day it will be a Jehovah's Witness that claims to be your child. Better not answer the door at all.

Darev, be sure to eat a poppy seed muffin every day.

9:21 AM  
Blogger g said...

i gave up hearing a while ago. well, listening that is. i got skillsaw ear.

7:55 PM  
Blogger The Guy Who Writes This said...

Start digging your grave right now. You are circling the drain.

5:20 AM  
Blogger g said...

i've been bugging the wife to buy me another shovel - one for each hand.

7:30 PM  

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