Don't Jump!
While driving to Bend on Rt. 197 from The Dalles I was able to see the beautiful country where the hay that I feed my horses comes from. After passing through the agricultural belt as you are rising in elevation you enter a hundred mile area of sage brush. The road is long and curvy and hilly. The horizon is punctuated by high tension transmission lines.
As a younger man I may have been tempted to do this trip on bicycle, but I’m no longer seeking such adventure. This road is a long one. You don’t want to leave The Dalles with less than a half tank of fuel because you won’t make it to the next gas station in Madras.
Speaking of adventure, while passing through the town of Maupin you drive across a bridge that is probably over a hundred feet above the cold and swift moving Deschutes River. On this bridge there is a sign that states that it is unlawful to jump or dive from this bridge. I’m sure they had to put that sign up because they had a problem with people doing just that. Wouldn’t it be interesting to place that sign on the Golden Gate Bridge or the George Washington Bridge? Maybe we can get one for the Astoria/Megler Bridge.
posted by The Guy Who Writes This at 5:35 AM
6 Comments:
A "Do Not Jump" sign is not going to dissuade a "jumper."
A popular jumping/suicide bridge was "fixed" in Toronto.
But if you're that determined to go, you'd simply find another one.
We need to form a secret society.
Here are the rules:
If you are driving across a bridge and see a jumper, pull up next to them and stop then set your flashers.
Do not look at them or make eye contact.
Watch your mirrors and traffic approaching.
When the coast is clear, get out of the car and approach the jumper.
The jumper wil probably say something like, "Don't come any closer or I'll jump!"
Ignore anything that is said, and do not speak to the jumper.
As soon as you reach the jumper, shove them off the bridge, then turn your back and return to your car and continue on your way.
Do not look down, do not look back, do not pay taxes for losers.
Who wants to decide on the secret handshake?
I'm in, Gearhead. Can we choose the jumper?
Gerahead, I wondered what that blur was in that photo of the bridge you sent me from Madras last year...
It would be an interesting dilema for someone wanting to jump off the Astoria-Megler bridge ... since they can't walk across it. They'd have to drive to their jumping point, park in the middle of the road, then jump.
That's what most of them do, though there the Walk for Life every year. We could have groups jumping off like lemmings.
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