Monday, June 08, 2009

I'm Not Proud, Or Shamed



I hear of people that find it necessary to discuss their heritage, religion or sexual preference in terms of pride. I have never had an issue with pride. Like many people, my ancestors came to America from the strange lands of Europe and Asia. I’m sure many of them dressed funny and ate foods that would make a vulture vomit. Though I am composed of all of the family genetics I can’t really say I’m particularly proud of any of them. It’s not that I am ashamed of my roots, I’m just not hyper aware of anything I am or anything that makes me who I am.

It’s like the lenses of your eyes, you see things but while you are seeing things you don’t think of how remarkable your lenses are unless there is a problem that limits your vision and keeps you conscious of the act of seeing.

When I think of pride, I feel like my pride is for others rather than myself or my make-up . I am proud of the accomplishments of others. I become proud of people that courageously step out of their comfort zones and accomplish something, but somehow I don’t have much self pride. I had no control of my roots and I only had control of the person that’s I’ve become, but there again I am who I am and there is no reason to be proud about it. I had to become someone and pride would be a self promotion of something that was happening anyway. I just don’t get the point of self pride unless I was trying to psych myself up.

Something about pride frightens me. It's like all pride has a shadow of shame following it. Unless you have done something to harm someone you really have no reason to feel shamed for anything. Do people bolster pride to cover up shame? I just don't get it.

6 Comments:

Blogger Beth said...

There’s feeling good about yourself, being content with who and what you are – and then there’s pride. I think a little pride is good for you – pride in the decisions you’ve made in life, how you deal with choices and other events.
It’s like giving yourself a well-deserved pat on the back.

5:34 AM  
Anonymous Auntie said...

Pride means different things to different people. It's a hard word to pin down for that reason.

History is probably full of atrocities that were committed in the name of misdirected "pride."

5:45 AM  
Blogger darev2005 said...

Being quietly proud of yourself for having accomplished something isn't bad. Even being a little loud about it to your peers now and then is okay. But being loudly overtly proud of something you have had no control over like heritage or sexuality is either a symptom of being secretly ashamed or wanting to rub someone else's nose in it. My own heritage is so mixed I can claim to be nothing but a mutt. And my sexual preferences are nobodys business but my own and those of my partners. I am comfortable with who I am, for the most part. I have no desire to parade down the street to advertise it.

6:35 AM  
Blogger Linda said...

I've always heard "pride goeth before the fall." Get too full of yourself and others will take you down.

9:29 AM  
Blogger Donna said...

Well, I have to say I AM proud of my family. On both sides, those people were poor as dirt and lived lives to be proud of. I can't even hope to ever be as strong as most of my forbears were.

I am proud!

8:19 PM  
Blogger The Guy Who Writes This said...

Pride is an interesting thing. I still have reservations about it.

5:24 AM  

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