Stuck Stickers

Now do you think that anyone cares that your child is an honor student? We don’t care, and you are embarrassing you kid, so scrub that damn thing off.

Do you really think we care what college you went to? We don’t care, besides if you have to advertise that you went to college you have an inferiority complex that states, “I may appear common but I’m educated.”

How about an “Easy Does It” sticker? This tells the world that you are in a 12-step program and that you have a friend named Bill W. Do I need to know this about you? If you have a problem, keep it to yourself or get a therapist. I don’t want to know about it.

How about an “Art Saves Lives” sticker? It did wonders for VanGogh, didn’t it?

I could go on for hours on this topic, but I’ll spare you. I’ll leave this topic to the stand-up comics. Just do me one favor, keep it to yourself.